Anytime I do anything as a bio mom or step (cringe!) mom I do it as though the judge is watching. With the amount of technology that is available today you never know who is watching & listening to what YOU'RE doing! You've heard of Big Brother? Well they have these dandy little things called Private Investigators. They are pretty much the same & are probably better & more organized than the government could ever be. They are also admissible in court.
If you're having an affair, they'll be able to prove it. If you're part of the parental alienation clan, they'll prove it. If you're an alcoholic, they'll prove it. If you're drinking & driving they'll prove it. If you have a short temper, they'll prove it. If you're beating on your kids or spouse, they'll prove it.
Aside from having a PI there are other ways to prove what you need to. Text messages, Emails, videos of child exchanges if they're nasty, Facebook is always a wealth of information. They have all kinds of websites for you to write your opinions, thoughts, & statuses. Be aware that you're stupid ex, may already know about them all. Then again your ex might be with someone who's deep down desire is to be a PI.
All of this is admissible in court. It's almost as though those are handwritten documents. Time/Date stamps are a fabulous thing.
I used them in my divorce with my ex. Proving that he was trying to have an extra-marital affair, his little buddy hanging out online for the world to see, his ads on AFF etc. I got my divorce on grounds of mental cruelty. In other words he was being 'bad' in our marriage and he irretrievably broke our vows. It didn't matter that I was dying for my divorce, I didn't get nailed for doing anything wrong.
If someone wants something bad enough, you'd be surprised the lengths that they're willing to go to to prove that you are not what you say you are. If they can prove this, get ready for hell in court. If they can't, you're sitting pretty.
In the end, Keep your nose clean. Don't do anything that you wouldn't want the world or the judge to see. DUI's, Warrants for your arrest, are NOT good things. Get it all cleared up before you go to court. If you can't, and your ex can prove this, you're in trouble.
If nothing else be overly nice to the ex. Read the previous blog about how I started out overly nice. This actually looks pretty good in court. To this day I still try and nurture a positive relationship with my ex & the children. I refuse to verbalize visitations or anything else. It's all done via text so that way if it comes back nasty, I have it to keep.
My oldest daughter has an extra Facebook account for his side of the family. She has one for my side of the family as well. Anytime the children ask to call their dad, I do it, unless I know for a fact that he's busy. Then I won't. If I tell them we'll call later, we do. As my children get older, they'll know that mommy tried her damnest to include their dad in everything. It was HIS choice NOT to come.
If you remember nothing else about this blog.. just remember, Act like the judge is watching!
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